May is Asparagus Month. No, I didn’t know that either, but I should have, because throughout my childhood, every single year, at this time, we would eat asparagus for tea. Every day. Literally. And I loved it. Terribly middle-class, I know.
Real proper English asparagus is unbeatable (especially if you like your vegetables green and phallic). There used to a be farm down the road from us that grew asparagus, and they’d plonk an honesty box outside their backdoor, we’d drive past on the way back from school, pick up a few bunches, throw in a fiver, and then home for tea.
Sometimes it would be really simple – just steamed asparagus, tossed in melted butter, and then the remaining butter drizzled on top. My brother and I would mop up the leftover butter with pieces of bread. Om nom. Sometimes the spears (not Britney) would be coated with balsamic dressing and sprinkled with crispy bacon bits. Drool. Other times, a soft poached egg was popped on top. And then if you grill the asparagus, it develops this lovely nutty flavour. I mean, there are so many ways to enjoy this wonderful vegetable.
But then, there’s the whole wee thing. (You didn’t think I’d write a post about asparagus and not mention that, did you? Fools) It doesn’t happen to everyone (apparently women are more susceptible) but for plenty of asparagus-lovers within hours your wee develops a distinctive, erm, smell. Charming, right? Nothing to worry about though. Phew! Although, I did once get a phone call from a worried chum who thought there was something wrong with her… Oh, how we laughed!
Enjoy the asparagus while the season lasts, my lovelies.